Relationships are not always easy.. I’ve learned it takes skill to attract a woman in your life… even more skill to establish a long term relationship and maintain a burning desire.
Entrepreneurship isn’t always easy… when you fully lean in and burn the ships… you realize that the confidence you once had wasn’t shit compared to TRUE confidence no matter what the circumstances.
Can you be truly confident when you don’t know how you’re going to pay the bills?
Can you be truly confident when your credit is shot?
Can you be truly confident if what you considered as “Survival” is at threat?
Combine the complexity of Entrepreneurship and maintaining a Long Term Relationship and you can have quite the shit storm. This is coming from a man who has 11 years of experience of relationship dynamics, attraction, Feminine & Masculine Energy… all sorts of knowledge around it.
My almost 7 Year Relationship started getting bland… and somewhat uncertain. We both had awareness but we created entanglements that were strangling the both of us. We found ourselves making agreements that were both out of alignment. We lost the flare that we once had…
We went on date night but we no longer dressed up for it.
We went out together but always the same spots.
We didn’t take care of ourselves like we once did.
We were in fear around finances and now knowing what the future will bring. She wondered if I could make her happy long term… after 2 years of battling and going through the shit. I wondered if she was truly able to date an Entrepreneur like myself and if she was aligned with this new life I was creating. We both started doubting each other….
The only reason we doubted each other is because somewhere we lost the Love & Acceptance we have for ourselves… We were convinced that we were both not good enough for each other, when the whole time we were on the SAME team.
I chose to invest into a 21 day “Love & Acceptance” course… because I knew that’s what I needed at the time… and literally in day 2 of the course is when our relationship boiled over and we broke up.
I knew I simply didn’t have the time to be a victim.
I realized that I was doing many things just to impress her or to HERO her… and for the longest time I wasn’t truly Loving and Honoring myself. This gave me a chance to build such a deep meaningful relationship with myself. When I did that… the clients and the money followed. The deeper I loved myself and the more I celebrated my wins the more wins would come through.
I wasn’t in the mindset of wanting to date again quite yet… but I was effortlessly attracting women into my life which was an awesome confidence builder.
What I found was… it wasn’t necessarily the MONEY that royally fucked up my relationship… hell it wasn’t even the money that really created the bankruptcy. It was because I was abandoning myself… I was so used to looking outside of me for confidence when it was WITHIN all this time. I abandoned the divine masculine… and that was a major thing that damaged our relationship.
I focused on loving and accepting me. I went into damage control and stayed in my space… not contacting my former girlfriend and just focusing on me.
In a result of being in Love, Acceptance and ALIGNMENT…
I had my best financial month. I shed 15 pounds of fat.
I build the confidence back up to start flirting with women again… better yet… flirting with the WORLD!!!!
After 6 weeks I re-initiated contact with my former girlfriend that we have so much history together. Seeing how she grew and evolved so much during the same time period as well.
As I write this.. I don’t know what the future will bring for me… but being in Love & Acceptance I don’t necessarily worry about that anymore, because I am no longer tightly attached to those external things and those ADDICTIONS I once thought created my identity.
I can say this though…
My former relationship is dead.
From being in Love & Acceptance I have the opportunity to start a new relationship with that same person.
It’s uncertain… but in a fun way. There’s a stronger attraction between the both of us, but it’s also like we he the re-set button and we’re meeting each other for the first time again.
We can both feel that attraction, and we both can tell that we both are into each other. Yet it’s so new and fresh… and unpredictable yet magical. Whatever happens… it will go perfectly.
And when I used to regret and second guess my decisions, I realized that all of the pain and struggle was meant to happen.
When you Love & Accept yourself… and you put alignment first…
The Universe will work with you.
BHav
The Spiritual SmartAss
Brandon Marshall Havener is a self proclaimed Spiritual SmartAss. He helps high level entreprenuers attract the relationship they desire without settle or sacrifice. He is a best selling author with the book titled ” Man of Excellence” where he dove deep into the inner game of dating for male entreprenuers… leaving no stone un turned. Brandon now works with both men and women with the deeper inner work where many people may have blind spots to what is truly blocking them experiencing True Love. https://www.facebook.com/OBHav
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